I Can’t Square Dance

I Can’t Square Dance

I just realized something: I can’t square dance. Whenever I tell people I can square dance, the always ask me to do some square dancing for them, and I’ve always been befuddled by their request. I cannot square dance.

We can square dance. Even just two of us can do a little bit of square dancing. But I, I cannot square dance.

As I was thinking about this, I started looking throughout the Mainstream list to find just one call that “I” could do…

Hmmm. Looks like Forward and Back can be done by just one person, forward 3 steps and pause, then back 3 steps and pause. But the more popular wording sees to be “Up to the Middle and Back,” in which case there must be at least 2 people - between whom to have some sort of “middle”.

You can promenade single file by your self around the circle, but then “the circle” pretty mush refers to some people standing in a circle-type shape.

Oops. I almost thought could at least U-Turn Back, until I read the rest of the definition - just in case it was followed by “and roll” or something - and I have to either have a partner or a set of dancers to turn toward.

Grand Square, “…turning one quarter on the fourth step to face partner..” Darn. Can’t do that either.

Shot, I can’t even get into position to do anything. I can’t be a wave - that takes at least 3. I don’t even qualify as a mini-wave. I can’t be a star. Now wait I can’t find the definition of a line. How many people does it take to make a minimal line? Can be a line of one? How would you tell?

Hmmm. I guess I can’t square dance after all. 

I need YOU.

Written by Patricia Wahle of Southern California. Re printed from American Square Dance Sept 2014.

 Spokane Area Council, Spokane, Washington